Monday, January 28, 2008

Tonight's Reflections

Unforgivable. That is how I feel sometimes. Looking back on the past few weeks, I feel as if I have been consistently giving my time to sin. I invited temptation into my mind and welcomed sin’s temporary pleasures. What should have been put to death immediately, grew into something that seemed too big to fight. I resided myself to think that the battle was lost. The enemy had me pinned down in a perfect position to fill my head with lies. “You are no good to the church, you can’t hear from God, you have gone farther than mercy can reach you." I had created my own giant, and it was defeating me. Andrew Peterson has expressed my thoughts better than I can in the last few verses of Come, Lord Jesus:

"It's taken me years in the race just to get this far
Still there is no end in sight,There's no end in sight
Cause I've carried my cross into dens of the wicked
And you know I blended in just fine

Well, I'm weak and I'm weary of breaking His heart
With they cycle of my sin, of my sin
Still He turns His face to me and I kiss it
Just to betray Him once again"

Today I have been meditating on the promise that God sees me perfect in His Son, whose blood and grace are sufficient for even me. As a new week approaches, I pray that I will “…put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh, to gratify its desires.” (Romans 13:14) I know that this battle has already been won, and I have no right not to fight it. So I pray with the Puritans: “O ever watchful Shepherd, lead, guide, tend me this day; Without they restraining rod I err and stray; Hedge up my path lest I wander into unwholesome pleasure, and drink its poisonous streams; Direct my feet that I be not entangled in Satan’s secret snares, nor fall into his hidden traps, Defend me from assailing foes, from evil circumstances, from myself.”


Michele said...

These lies are so powerful. "Sure, Kellye/Michele/fill-in-the-blank, you were saved by grace. But look at how you are now behaving! Get to work and clean yourself up before you go back to God as a beggar again."

The truth that we can never clean ourselves up remains, but it stands alongside the truth that we don't have to.

I am praying today that God's powerful spirit will give you victory in battle today and that your heart will be filled with fresh love and hope as a result.

Always learning from you and benefiting from fighting with you...Love, M